That made me chuckle abstractly...
Hats off to you my friend, all of those pubeless ten-year old kids who have threatened you, poked fun at you, and pulled their fingers out of their pudgy asses to key empty wastes of review space can go and fornicate themselves with a cudgel. Loved the expression, loved the delivery, and it was funny as hell.
You my friend have more cajones then half this site.